sick one's way 




 Everyday I live with itch.
 That's my burden.


Some people are active all the time while they awake.
They work and play one after another, trying to do anything.
I cannot ever be like them.

I always consider of my Atopic Dermatitis before I do everything.
-Can I complete this when I decide to do it?
-Isn't this too hard for me to preserve my present composed health?
Quickly I ask myself, and I won't start until the answer is
"Yes, I think I can do it."
That's a practice for me.


I returned to dermatologist work 3 years ago after 11 years of recuperation,
but I still work only three days a week now.
I sometimes feel guilt about it.

I enjoy my work.
I'm happy I can contribute to sick people by my medical career,
additionally by my personal expieriences about sickness.
I sometimes can't help wondering if I should work more
and render more services to the society as a physician.

But I know too much work will bankrupt my weak body.


Every day we have to manage in this busy complicated modern society.
Besides Japanese nature tend to require excess hard-working.

Hard work has no end.
You can always try to work harder.
However, such hard work will be a proportionate load to your body and soul,
although you may not be aware of it.

Our power is not endless as our lives are limited.
And we are one of them, respectively, not absolute.
Each of us should be a finite, but/therefore valuable one.

So, I think it's good for a good life
to avoid doing too hard and not to stop going.
Within suitable condition in which we can keep us in good health,
we should try better and keep on working.

Sabotage is not good, of course.
But we human cannot always be on in 100% power.
Moreover, sick ones must recognize that
they have less than 100% power from the beginning.


We should try to achieve our given lives.
Everyone can play some role in this society.
Even if in sickness, we definitely can do something meaningful.

Let's live our lives in our size.
And create something good from our beautifle hearts.

2009.4.  

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